Review: Countdown #2 & #1

Issue #2 picks up right where #3 left off: Jimmy Olsen and Darkseid duking it out. Of course, Olsen gets his butted kicked. Why? Because Jimmy Olsen MUST DIE! Oh shoot, who’s that!? It’s Orion, son of Darkseid and he’s got a knuckle sandwich for his pops. BOOM!!! Cosmic explosions!!! City in ruins!!! What should we do Superman? “Nothing,” said Superman. I was totally into this issue till Superman showed up. Why did we need those panels? It just makes these guys look like idiots. Darkseid and his spawn are ripping the shit out of the city, thousands of people are in danger and the fricking Justice League is sitting on their hands? ON PURPOSE!?!? That scene could have been left out completely! It totally draws attention to obvious plot holes!!! BAD WRITING ALERT!!! Anyway, the issue ends with Orion ripping his dear old dad’s heart out. Prophecy Fulfilled.

As for the final issue of Countdown… I have to admit, I honestly don’t feel qualified commenting on it. I missed about 8 months of this story so anything I say now is an educated guess at best. But I’ll say my piece anyway. As final issues go, it felt lackluster. Maybe I’m just not invested enough in the characters… how could I be? Anyway, there were a few things I do feel comfortable making fun of, like this: OH… MY… GAY? Someone needs to explain that one to me. And this “who watches the watchers” crap? How are you going to enforce what ever it is you think you’re going to enforce, Kyle? Stuff like this is why I’m glad I missed this boat. Having read the final issue, I feel vindicated in my decision in not investing 100+ dollars on this pile of cat feces.

Oh, but the covers were nice. Heh.

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